HotFrugal, Hot Date

The New York Times just told me that I’m not sexy.  Ouch. 

There is a certain “f-word” that people quite enjoy in the context of dating, but there is another f-word, “frugal”, that is apparently less appealing.  According to the NYT article, a survey conducted by ING Direct (an online bank specializing in savings accounts) found that less than 4% of respondents thought someone described as frugal was likely to be sexy.  Meanwhile, 15% thought such a person would be boring, and 27% thought a frugal person would be stingy.

The article goes on to offer advice about subtle ways to convey one’s frugality to potential mates without actually using the dreaded f-word.  Describing oneself as “frugal” is apparently a direct path to spinsterhood.  I find this fascinating, amusing, and slightly disturbing since I am both single and frugal.  I’m in no rush to settle down, but I do enjoy going on dates with the fellas.  I don’t like the idea that my responsible relationship with money could be seen as equally appealing to men as high necked sweaters and granny panties.

After all, there’s a reason why I named this blog HotFrugal.  I may be in the minority, but I really do think frugality is hot.  In fact, I can’t imagine being in a serious relationship with any man who isn’t at least somewhat responsible with his money.  Living paycheck-to-paycheck puts a tremendous amount of stress on a couple’s relationship.  What on earth is sexy about that? 

Perhaps the people responding to ING’s survey just aren’t aware of all the ways in which frugal is sexy.  So I’m going to help them out:

The HotFrugal Top 10 Reasons Why a Frugal Woman is a Hot Woman

  1. Women who are financially secure aren’t needy.  A man dating a frugal woman will never have to wonder if she’s really interested in him or his money.
  2. Frugal women are independent and self confident, so we don’t need to play games.
  3. Frugal women don’t waste money on silly lingerie.  They just show up in bed naked.  Men don’t seem to have a problem with this.
  4. We know that we get the best value from experiences, so we’re pretty fun to hang out with.  We like to play sports, go camping, travel, and learn new things.
  5. Dealing with money issues head-on makes it easy for women to address other issues directly.  We can say what’s on our minds without dropping passive aggressive hints or expecting men to be telepathic. 
  6. When we go on vacations, we can afford them.  A relaxing, romantic getaway isn’t undone by the stress of figuring out how to pay off the credit card months later.
  7. Frugal women aren’t materialistic, so it’s easy to make us happy with small, thoughtful gestures. 
  8. Not being materialistic, we have no appreciation for the metrosexual look.  We will not expect a man to spend hours shopping and grooming like he’s, well, a woman.
  9. Even if there’s room for improvement, frugal women tend to be healthier and in better shape.  We know that poor health is expensive, so we take pretty good care of ourselves.
  10. Frugal women know how to work toward a goal and we know how and when to compromise.  We can be supportive, and we can accept support as well.

Most of the items on this list are just as sexy if they are applied to men instead of women.  But I would be curious to know what my male readers think… What makes a frugal man a hot man?  Leave a comment, or if you prefer anonymity, email me at hotfrugal at gmail dot com.  If I get enough feedback, I’ll post The HotFrugal Top 10 Reasons Why a Frugal Man is a Hot Man.

Viva la Frugal!



Filed under Frugal

5 responses to “HotFrugal, Hot Date

  1. Kristen

    I think a frugal man is sexy because he has a sort of quiet confidence about his ability to be leader through managing his finances. It’s hot!

  2. Caroll

    I think you should send this to the NYT. It’s a great list!

    Frugal men are sexy because it’s their way to maintain independence. A frugal man is his own man. I think that’s hot. He values the peace of mind financial security brings, and frees his mind for other more interesting things.

    Frugal is not a synonym for stingy! Indeed, good financial management/security allows for genuine and joyful giving – of resources, time, one’s self.

  3. Sandi

    Angela, this was laugh-out-loud good fun and good sense. Loved #3 and am wondering if the same applies to wearing your significant other’s old Redskins t-shirt. Recycling is frugal and sexy, right? Please respond by 11:00 p.m.

    Frugal men are sexy because, similiar to #6, when they come up with a fun, spontaneous idea (“Let’s go away this weekend.”) you know they have the cash in hand to do it.

    • Karah

      Frugal men are hot because they are unassuming, aren’t judgmental and are very easy going.

      They are also excellent gift givers, very creative and thoughtful.

      PS – I agree, send this post to NYT!

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